‘Don’t be agarbatti parents who provide and leave. Spend time with your child’

July 19, 2026 - 15:12

"Does your child only listen to Alexa and ignore you?" asks the woman in a sari, introducing herself as the head of T.H.A.P.P.A.D -- The Holistic Academy of Positive Parenting and Discipline. "That's because Alexa doesn't nag like you. Just record your instructions with an AI filter and see."

Her point cuts through the noise of modern parenting. Many parents, she argues, have become "agarbatti parents" -- they light the incense, provide for the home, and then vanish. They assume that earning money and buying things is enough. But children today crave presence, not just provisions.

The rise of voice assistants and screen-based entertainment has changed how kids interact. If a parent's voice is always laced with criticism or commands, a child will naturally turn to a device that never raises its tone. The solution is not to ban technology, but to change how we communicate.

She suggests that parents try recording their own instructions in a calm, neutral tone and play them back. The difference is often shocking. The same words, delivered without frustration, land completely differently. It is a simple trick, but it reveals a deeper truth: connection takes effort, not just money. Being present means putting down the phone, listening without interrupting, and choosing patience over irritation. The incense stick burns out, but a parent's time can leave a lasting warmth.